Fall In Love With Souls, Not Faces

This, right here, is beautiful. This is Rachel Farnsworth of The Stay at Home Chef, responding to some mean-spirited comments about her gray hair and "looking old". Give it a watch.

Like Rachel, I have a very different perspective on aging as well. At 39, I have a lot of grey hair now, too. I know I'm a guy and that nobody really cares, but I don't particularly "like" them either, and my joke is that I admire every single one of them and then go and get a fresh "Mr. Clean" buzz cut. Yes, grey hair means I'm still here. That means a lot to someone who was diagnosed with cancer at the age of 33 and thought they were going to die, nearly did die during a surgery fighting it, and once again feared death when they thought their cancer had returned on a few occasions in the years after. I don't have the younger face that I did a few years ago, I have a whole lot less hair now, and many more of them are grey, and I love every bit of it. It means I'm still alive, and still here to enjoy my family and my friends, and people that have been meaningful to me in my life.

I'm blessed to be married to an incredibly beautiful woman, and to have a few more as friends. They go to great lengths to keep themselves looking younger and are terrified of aging. I think they're crazy. I fall in love with souls, not with faces, or hair color. A beautiful person to me is one who's beautiful on the inside, and that beauty will shine through to the outside. In a world full of fakes, it's so easy to tell.

Rachel Farnsworth is doing exactly what we all need to be doing, focusing on making the best possible lives for ourselves right now. Just as there's no guarantee for someone like Rachel later in life with an auto-immune disease, there's no guarantee for those of us that have had cancer as young adults, either. We need to live the best possible lives that we can for ourselves right now, and each and every day. But guess what? There's no guarantees for anybody period. Life and health are not givens, never were, and never will be either. We all need to live for each day, not just those of us with cancer histories or diseases lurking in the background.

Rachel has a fair number of grey hairs, and whatever else you want to pick out. All I see is a beautiful woman, because I see the beautiful soul within. Bodies and looks will come and go. A beautiful soul is forever. That's what's worth falling in love with, and that can never be taken from you. Fall in love with souls, not with faces, and put the judgement away.




As I'm typing this now, I've just learned that breast cancer survivor and author, Nalie Agustin has experienced a recurrence of her cancer, and that it's metastasized to her lungs. She has to start chemotherapy again today, she's going to lose her hair again, and her whole life and world and all of the big plans she had for 2017 and beyond just came crashing down. Here's another beautiful soul. Forget about hair or losing it. Perhaps this puts things in perspective for a few, of just how much of a privilege it is to even have hair, as people fighting for their lives against cancer commonly don't. Nalie and so many other cancer fighters like her will always be beautiful no matter what, because the soul within is beautiful. Only a fake friend or one who's ugly on the inside would make such disparaging comments about grey hair or no hair, and the last thing cancer fighters and survivors need are people like those in their lives. Good riddance. Stay strong Nalie! We're all with you!