It's bad enough to have sources of pain in our lives as it is, but cancer will push you far beyond your limits, without mercy. It doesn't matter if it's a thing, a belief, an attitude, or a person that's hurting you. You have to put yourself first, love and care for yourself first, and find the courage to let go of other sources of pain in your lives. We're creatures of habit. We stick with what we know, even when it might be causing us tremendous amounts of pain. The lowest point of my life came when I had been in so much pain from cancer related demons inside of me, that I had contemplated suicide as a means to an end. That was the wakeup call that I needed, and the point when I gained the courage to clear the decks, because I was dying inside spiritually, and needed to save myself.
I've told people that I had genuinely cared about to not ever speak to me again, because they had been hurting me, and have quietly walked away from or distanced myself from others. I've uprooted beliefs, attitudes, and philosophies about life, and have developed entirely new routines, and new friendships. There isn't much that I haven't changed in my life since cancer became a part of it. I just wanted to be happy again, and to find peace. I might look similar on the outside, but I'm an entirely new person on the inside today. It takes courage to confront cancer, and it takes even more courage to make so many changes in our lives in response. After years of continually evolving, letting go of the old and embracing the new, I've finally found that inner peace and happiness that I'd been in search of for so long, five years after my cancer diagnosis.
Evolving takes not only courage, but time as well.